Its July time when the summer season is on its peak ,the heat waves are all flowing and the monsoon rains adds up the humidity in the air which makes the summer more difficult to survive in and there is a worst thing adds up to it is vacations and in our region vacations means that the only place where you feel enjoyable and have fun with friend is now closed and you are stuck in a house for 24 hours with your mother criticizing every breath you take and with no entertainment other than using mobile.
Well i guess mobile is blessing in a disguise or you say disguise looking like a blessing.
Whenever you open the mobile to find some entertainment or to divert you self from the world and you thank god for a blessing like mobile which entertains you but you end up seeing all those happy faces, acheivments,engagements,relationships,success and all those people doing something and there is you are doing nothing just sitting on a sofa and scrolling, I know it gives anxiety ,depression and unworthiness. That feeling makes yourself sinks in a deep silence. In that unworthy moment that only thing you want to do is to just skip the world for a while ,just become invisible or you may say vanished from this earth like you have no self or no identify ,you just want to escape your surroundings, just want to sleep because that's the only thing you can do to shut this world for a while. Or you want to cry your heart out cause maybe that will help you to not get sinked and make you swim and get out of the situation.
But guess what? It gets more annoying and more sinking when you have no privacy and you can not cry your heart out or even sleep to skip the world. And your have to pretend that's everything normal. Act normal, put a smile forcefully on your face, attend events(even though you feel more anxious in gatherings). Well that's the case ,that the reality and i know most people goes through it they cannot explain it maybe because of fear that the other person will make fun of it, or the other person will not understand my point or may be the other person will get bored or annoyed of me being sad or depressed all the time.
All these social pressure make your anxiety even worse cause you just keep surprising your emotions and you faked a personality that you are not. You just let social pressure hold yo tight while you sacrifice your own worth, your own self.
Depression is a bog which sometime polished your skills and if you rise high from it and sometime its rusts your skills. If you get sink in it. So its your choice that which thing you choose.
I hope i am not boring you guysš
Meet you guys in the next blogā„ļø
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